I know everyone’s wondering what’s in store for President Trump so I thought I’d explain how impeachment actually works.

Imagine you’re back in high school.

You’re popular with half the school but the others think you’re a dick. So your enemies come up with a reason to get you kicked out of school.

But first, your friends get to hold a trial to see if you really are a dick. The school principal presides over the process so everything’s on the up and up.

At the end of the trial your friends all agree that you’re not a dick, so you get to stay in school.

The end.

That’s exactly how impeachment works — has always worked — with one exception. There once was a kid named Richard Nixon who didn’t have any friends, so he just quit school and split.  

In case you need a decoder ring, you’re the President, your enemies are the House, your friends are the Senate, and the principal is the Chief Justice.

And yes, it really is that simple, that subjective and that stupid.

In the history of the nation, no president has ever been removed from office by the impeachment process.  

Image credit iamcootis / Flickr